night run ramblings

by mandaceehb

my phone is spoilt. the songs break apart in the middle of themselves and the intermission time is not calculable. all that’s left to hear are my footsteps, cicadas alive and screeching past 8pm and my own body alive and panting, heart pounding so hard i wonder if i can endure another round without collapsing. i haven’t run in so long i’ve forgotten how this fatigue sounds like; can’t really feel my legs but it is a good feeling. when my feet are hitting the ground i’m looking at my own shadow leading the way ahead of me in a tired shuffle (as it looks to me); my shadow across the ground of grass clumps, slanting across the asphalt path, overlapping and criss-crossing with other shadows so that it becomes an undefined dark mess and i can no longer tell which is mine. my shadow enjoined to my feet, pulling me forward.